November 08, 2003

matrix revolutions--oh my

niobe.jpgAt the end of Matrix Revolutions, Stanley said, "There's $300 million down the tubes." Which pretty much sums it up.

Though we were both somewhat disappointed with Reloaded, we thought, nay hoped, maybe the best stuff was being saved for this one, so paid our $9.00 per ticket to see it.

If you haven't seen Reloaded, don't spend big bucks to see Revolutions, because you won't understand a thing.

Here's my question. If the "real world" is dirty and dingy and beset with danger and nasty machines and you have to live in this big underground bubble and where ratty looking sweaters (that all look the same), why would you ever take the red pill? Gimme the blue pill, thank you very much.

If you're hoping for answers, forget it. There are no answers, mainly because the questions keep changing. Neo isn't even in half the movie, and the fight for Zion goes on and on and on and on ... and gee whiz, Sarge, I can do it, golly gee I can. The gruff captain part that serves no purpose, The Kid that serves no purpose, the council questioning that serves no purpose, the "Neo trapped in between" that is never explained and serves no purpose. The stuff that could be intensely interesting given very short shrift: the Trainman, the Ghost, the Machine World. But not the Frenchman, played by a very shitty actor.

Why are the Zionists and the Machines at war? No answer to be found here.

Not much time spent in the world above the world--which is what made Mx1 so interesting to begin with. The whole point of the Matrix was the Matrix.

The Wachowski Brothers should have spent some of that money on good writers. They should've waited until Reloaded played before starting on Revolutions--they probably would've made a much better movie. What Revolutions reveals is how shallow and sophomoronic the Wachowski Brothers really are--they're comic- book- movie creators, not philosophers, fer cryin' out loud.

The silliest things in the movie were the battlebots. What moron designed these? Any soldier strapping in to one of these would be dead of internal hemorrhaging after just "walking" a few steps.

And Agent Smith--good grief. I could never figure out why he developed into such a threat, especially to the machines--what, exactly, was the problem, anyway? This is not a trivial question, as the resolution of the whole trilogy hinges on dealing with the threat Agent Smith has become. His lines were among the stupidest of the movie (in a movie with many, many stupid lines).

And what about all the people in the Matrix? I thought Neo was supposed to "save" them. Maybe the WBs finally figured out that there was no way the planetary infrastructure that they'd set up could support a billion or so pod people if they finally woke up and demanded some dinner.

All in all, Revolutions is a huge disappointment. Definitely do not pay full price to see it--even matinée prices are a little on the steep side for what you get.

Posted by Lee at November 8, 2003 02:43 PM | TrackBack
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